Ruah Bull - Spiritual Director

 If you are one who has practice meeting the pain of the world, we need you. Right now we need you to teach us it is possible to swallow what is weighty and still be able to rise. We need you to remind us we can be furious and scared and near feral over injustice and still thrill at the taste of a strawberry, ripe and sweet, can still meet a stranger and shake their hand, believing in their humanness. We need you to show us how we, too, can fall into the darkest, unplumbed pit and learn there a courage and beauty we could never learn from the light. If you have drowned in sorrow and still have somehow found a way to breathe, please, lead us. You are the one with the crumbs we need, the ones we will use to find our way back to the home of our hearts.

Great Spirit Remove from me All that gets in the way Of my being who you ask me to be So that I might  do What you ask me to do 

 Open unto me - light for my darkness Open unto me - courage for my fear Open unto me - hope for my despair Open unto me - peace for my turmoil Open unto me - joy for my sorrow Open unto me - wisdom for my confusion Open unto me - tenderness for my toughness Open unto me - love for my hates Open unto me - Holy Companion - open unto me 

 I used to pray that God would feed the hungry,  or do this, or that. But now I pray that God will guide me to do whatever I am supposed to do. I used to pray for answers, but now I pray  for strength. I used to believe that prayer changes things, but now I know that prayer changes us and we  change things,

 We would rather be ruined than changed We would rather die in our dread than climb the cross of the moment and let our illusions die

 This is how a human being can change: There's a worm addicted to eating grape leaves. Suddenly he wakes up, call it grace, whatever, something  wakes him, and he is no longer a worm. He's the entire vineyard and the orchard, too, the fruit, the trunks, a growing wisdom and joy that doesn't need to devour.

 Everyone assumes That the perfumes of August Are the work of springtime's buds Ageing into blooms. But the fading rose, In her dying, knows, It is the joy of ceasing That distills perfume.

 Let the vision of the vastness you are leave you in glorious ruins. Pilgrims will come to imagine the grand temple that once stood, not realizing the wreck  made this empty plain holy ground.

 How many nights must it take one such as me to learn that we aren't, after all, made from that bird that flies out of its ashes, that for us as we go up in flames, our one work is to open ourselves, to be the flame?

 This is how I would die: Into the Love I have for you as pieces of cloud dissolve in sunlight.

  Day ends, and before sleep when the sky dies down, consider your altered state: has this day changed you? Are the corners sharper or rounded off? Did you live with death? Make decisions that quieted? Find one clear word that fit? At the sun's midpoint did you notice a pitch of absence, bewilderment that invites the possible? What did you learn from things you dropped and picked up and dropped again? Did you set a straw parallel to the river, let the flow carry you downstream?

    Want the change. Be inspired by the flame where everything shines as it disappears. The artist, when sketching, loves nothing so much as the curve of the body as it turns away.  What locks itself in sameness has congealed. Is it safer to be grey and numb? What turns hard becomes rigid and is easily shattered. Pour yourself out like a fountain. Flow into the knowledge that what you are seeking finishes often at the start, and, with ending, begins. Every happiness is the child of a separation it did not think it could survive. And Daphne, becoming a laurel, dares you to become the wind.               

I've taken long walks craving one thing only: lightening transformation You.

Sometimes the way to milk and honey is through the body. Sometimes the way in is a song. But there are three ways in the world:      dangerous, wounding, and beauty. To enter stone, be water. To rise through hard earth, be plant desiring sunlight, believing in water. To enter fire, be dry. to enter life, be food.

I've taken long walks craving one thing only: Lightening Transformation You

Oh Lord, remember not only the men and women of good will, but also those of ill will. But do not remember all the suffering they inflicted on us; Remember the fruits we have bought, thanks to the suffering - our comradeship,our loyalty, our humility, our courage,our generosity, the greatness of heart which has grown out of all of this. And when they come to judgement, let all the fruits which we have born be their forgiveness.

Want the change. Be inspirired by the flame where everything shines as it disappears. The artist, when sketching, loves nothing so much as the curve of the body as it turns away. What locks itself in sameness has congealed. Is it safer to be grey and numb? What turns hard becomes rigid and is easily shattered. Pour yourself out like a fountain. Flow in the knowledge that what you are seeking finishes often at the start, and, with ending, begins. Every happiness if the child of a separation it did not think it could survive. And Daphne, becoming a laurel, dares you to become the wind.